Mr. Menendez's Ethics Problem  —  Senator Robert Menendez was never a distinguished choice for chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, the position he ascended to this month by virtue of seniority.  Concerns about that quality gap have sharply escalated amid new disclosures …

Bill Maher Blasts Donald Trump for Suit Over Orangutan Joke  —  Anyone who is a regular reader of this site is probably already familiar with Donald Trump's threat to sue Bill Maher over his joke where he asked flame thrower and birther for proof that he was not the result of his mother having sex with an orangutan.

U.S. Cancels Regular Drone Strikes on Saturdays  —  WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Citing budgetary concerns, the United States announced today that it would discontinue regular Saturday drone strikes on U.S. citizens, beginning in 2014.  —  In announcing the decision …

Obama's Treasury pick hits Cayman Island snag  —  An investment Jack Lew made in the Cayman Islands has been flagged as an issue in the Treasury secretary nominee's vetting by the Senate Finance Committee, according to multiple sources close to the confirmation process.

Heavy Snow and Winds Batter Northeast  —  A ferocious storm system pummeled the Northeast on Saturday, burying some parts of region in more than two feet of snow and leaving more than 650,000 homes and businesses without power, mostly in New England.  —  After a day of pelting wet snow …

EXCLUSIVE: ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT TO TESTIFY IN SENATE NEXT WEEK—WITH ICE AGENT WHO CANNOT ARREST HIM  —  Breitbart News has learned that one of the witnesses at the Senate Judiciary Committee hearings on immigration next week will be outspoken illegal immigrant Jose Antonio Vargas …

Cummings: Postal Service cuts would hurt minority groups, single mothers  —  The U.S. Postal Service's decision to eliminate Saturday delivery could disproportionally hurt minority groups, according to Rep. Elijah Cummings (D-Md.), the ranking member on the House Oversight Committee.

First lady to mourn slain teen  —  First lady Michelle Obama on Saturday plans to attend the funeral of a 15-year-old Chicago girl gunned down outside her school, a gesture both personal and political in nature.  —  Hadiya Pendleton, the South Side teen who was shot a just over a mile …

Our Future Will be Hunger Games USA  —  The nation is already accustomed to watching “reality shows” where ordinary folk — their foibles and failures — are served up as entertainment.  And we're already comfortable with an idea of separate standards for the elite folk who fly private jets …

Fact Sheet: Examples of How the Sequester Would Impact Middle Class Families, Jobs and Economic Security  —  Unless Congress acts by March 1st, a series of automatic cuts—called a sequester—that threaten thousands of jobs and the economic security of the middle class will take effect.

The Secret Art of George W. Bush  —  W. paints!  Who would have thought it?  Thanks to a hacker known as Guccifer who wormed into the computer of the 43rd president's sister, the world has learned that George W. Bush is an amateur - I would say serious amateur - painter.

Dorner manhunt: Lawyer calls shootings of paper carriers ‘unacceptable’  —  An attorney representing two women who were delivering newspapers when they were shot by police during a massive manhunt for an ex-LAPD officer called the incident “unacceptable,” saying his clients looked nothing like the suspect.

Rand Paul to deliver tea party response to Obama, GOP  —  Washington (CNN) - Tea party leaders are turning to Sen. Rand Paul, R-Kentucky, to deliver their message following President Barack Obama's State of the Union address, a speech that will compete with the official Republican response.

Fertility and immigration  —  Global demographics, not domestic policy, will control who comes and who goes.  —  President Obama speaks to the U.S. House Democratic Issues Conference in Lansdowne, Va., where he reportedly implored Democrats in the House to stay with their principles during legislative fights …